I met up with a colleague for a coffee and some catch up time and this book was sitting on the table. Based on the title alone I wanted to read it. It’s a dense book and in some circles has been controversial as it challenges some ideas around abuse and has thus been criticized for enabling abuse itself. However, I think her point is incredibly timely, the book was published in 2016. One of her main premises is that often, discomfort is mischaracterised as “abuse.” This then has the impact of shutting down meaningful dialogue and truncates working towards repair.